Along with many of you, I could spend hours looking at the house tours on apartmentthereapy.com. Today’s tour even has a literary angle, since you can investigate Elizabeth Crane’s Wicker Park pad. Her husband sure does some nifty artwork, but where are all the books?

Wednesday, June 27, 2007; Stop Smiling Storefront
Written by: Mairead Case

The Stop Smiling Storefront is frozen white tile and wood floors, a black curtain and folding chairs, and sinks that look like see-though flying saucers. All gathered there last Wednesday had either forearm tattoos or polished stone necklaces: red mostly, otherwise blue. There was a soundtrack from old cartoons; you kept waiting for an anvil to drop or Gargamel to appear.

Austin Grossman, who daylights as a videogame programmer, read first from his new book, Soon I Will Be Invincible. It’s a dorktastic superhero romp written, in part, to “interfere with the dignity of your standard writing workshop.” Grossman looks like an excited rabbit, and used his hands to punctuate lines like “thermonuclear nanotechnological gadgets,” or “somebody with an insect’s head was passed out on the couch.” He’d marked his passages with blue Post-It and made satisfying thwoks with his microphone. He said he liked his work and was proud of it, which was awesome because (1) most people don’t admit that but (2) he did without being pompous.

Paul Hornschemeier was next, and his reading voice is perfect: half necktie and slicked back hair, half comfortable warmth. He’d yoinked his piece, which was about going home for Easter, from an article Life commissioned before it folded. There were photographs to match the narrative: laundry-basket crosshatch, Dad in a Navy sweatshirt, those origami boxes lawyers use, and bread shaped like a swan. Hornschemeier mentioned “Chicago’s sullen pewter” while images of crepe paper and yellow pipe cleaners appeared. This was like swallowing something delicious and buttery. I was bummed we didn’t see any of his drawings, especially from the recently-released The Three Paradoxes. He seemed a little nervous, too.

Last came Nick Bertozzi, who hopped on stage in a fishing hat and dove in without an introduction. Bertozzi’s latest book, The Salon, is 178 pages in lime and mustard and rouge, populated by Modernists like Stein and Toklas, Satie, Gaguin, and a charmingly pugnacious Picasso, who sometimes paints with a “meat brush” and says “if drowing is sheet, I fight jou.” (All these guys made their work over 75 years ago, so Bertozzi didn’t have to work for copyright.)

The panels were projected on the wall behind Bertozzi, who used different voices and accents (Stein says “piquant” like it rhymes with “pecan,” but Braque was peaked), in a continuous sound stream. Once, the switch took longer than expected, so Bertozzi turned into a Foley artist, making the sounds of wind through curtains, fingernails on flesh, and Star Wars- noises. Sixteen polka-dotted baby ducks could have can-canned on the sidewalk outside with tickertape orking seals and Klaus Nomi’s ghost; I would not have noticed.

After the readings, everybody mingled over PBRs and Book Cellar wares. Bertozzi drew portraits instead of just a signature. “That,” said the guy behind me, “is so you don’t try to sell it on E-bay.” Gotcha.

Mairead Case blogs at http://www.fabulouscolor.blogspot.com. She’s all shook up, like a bottle of pop.

Date: Wednesday, June 27
Time: 8:30 p.m.
Location: California Clipper, 954 N. California
Participants: Tony Lagouranis

Did you see that Frontline episode with the guy who wrote about his stint in the military interrogating prisoners at Abu Ghraib and Fallujah? Well, it was chilling, and Tony Lagouranis has since been covered by Hardball with Chris Matthews, the Chicago Reader, and the Chicago Sun Times. At this book release party sponsored by the Guild Complex, Lagouranis will read from his new book “Fear Up Harsh: An Army Interrogator’s Dark Journey Through Iraq,” which is being called “an unflinching firsthand account of how one man struggled with his own conscience and ultimately broke the silence surrounding interrogation practices.” By all accounts, this is a courageous piece of writing. Plus, for those of you that need to imbibe whilst listening, the Clipper makes a nice stiff summertime drink. Come, think, discuss.

Date: Wednesday, June 27
Time: 8pm
Location: Stop Smiling H.Q.
Participants: Nick Bertozzi, Austin Grossman, Paul Hornscheimer

The three fliers for the second Printers’ Ball-sponsored event were created in honor of its three extraordinarily sophisticated participants. Bertozzi’s The Salon is a graphic novel about the origins of Cubism and life in 1907 Paris, Grossman is a video game designer/doctoral candidate in literature at UC Berkeley who wrote an intelligent book about superheroes, and Horscheimer seems poised to become the Charlie Kauffman of comics. Leave it to Bookslut and Stop Smiling to put on such a terrific event.

Thanks, everyone, for turning out! We danced our asses off thanks to Jason Deuchler (Intel) and Dave Fischoff (Spoolwork). Thanks especially to Jenn Sodini and the other residents of the Halfway House for their excellent hospitality. Thanks to all of you who lent a hand (in no particular order):
Angie Vo, Sheba White, the Former Ice Factorians, Nicole and Brandon Balch, Felix Jung, Lara Kalwinski, Christen Carter, Amanda Phelps, Fred Sasaki, Linda & Mark Kalwinski, Rebekah Holmes, Kate Seremek, Sarah Coffey and Steve Steim, Kate Melcher, Vanessa Roanhorse, Michelle Litavecz and her friend, Bill and Kathleen Oliver of Oliver Winery, Colleen Douglass, and Rob Funderburk (for his diplomatic advice, always). We couldn’t have done it without you! And finally, thanks to Chris Hiltz for his terrific photographs which he has shared with us. You can see pictures from the launch in our “Readings, Rated” section.

Thanks, everyone, for turning out! We danced our asses off thanks to Jason Deuchler (Intel) and Dave Fischoff (Spoolwork). Thanks especially to Jenn Sodini and the other residents of the Halfway House for their excellent hospitality. Thanks to all of you who lent a hand (in no particular order):
Angie Vo, Sheba White, the Former Ice Factorians, Nicole and Brandon Balch, Felix Jung, Lara Kalwinski, Christen Carter, Amanda Phelps, Fred Sasaki, Linda & Mark Kalwinski, Rebekah Holmes, Kate Seremek, Sarah Coffey and Steve Steim, Kate Melcher, Vanessa Roanhorse, Michelle Litavecz and her friend, Bill and Kathleen Oliver of Oliver Winery, Colleen Douglass, and Rob Funderburk (for his diplomatic advice, always). We couldn’t have done it without you! And finally, thanks to Chris Hiltz for his terrific photographs which he has shared with us. They were posted under the iron-fisted dictatorship of photo editor Stuart Allen - you can find the entire set on Chris’ Flickr page. Enjoy!

Sunday, June 24th, 2007; Quimby’s
Written by: Sarah Coffey

Not your typical quiet Sunday afternoon reading, Comedy by the Numbers (McSweeney’s, $14) was more of a knockdown drag-out funny fest (especially when Bob Odenkirk took the stage). Authors Eric Hoffman and Gary Rudoren wrote the book, with Odenkirk and his wife Naomi acting as cheerleaders and editors. Odenkirk drew a large crowd to the Quimby’s reading, which was really more of a skit-comedy show divided loosely into three sections:

1. “Professor” Hoffman and “Doctor” Rudoren introduced the book and its everyday applications, including “Fart Noises” and “Funny Names for your Pet” (e.g. Toodles, Little Asshole the Goldfish, Lil’ Miss Eats Everything).

2. Midway into the presentation, “college comic” Dick Mathers made his way through the crowd, played by Odenkirk with maniacal vim.

3. Hoffman and Rudoren wrapped up the show with a demonstration of “one-downsmanship” (the opposite of one-upsmanship), topping one another’s stories of childhood trauma and ending with Rudoren’s claim that “My parents made me memorize the constitution, shot me up full of heroin, and sent me out trick-or-treating as Lenny Bruce.”

The first half of the reading closely mirrored the book itself, with Hoffman and Rudoren supporting their thesis that “true creativity comes from simple formulas and the memorization of data” by reading through their numbered prescriptions for comedy in no particular order. The funniest tips took the politically incorrect approach, with gems like:

#57 – Humor Funny to Gays (long pause)
“The authors are not gay, but consider themselves brave enough to include this brand of comedy based on the likelihood that you or someone you know is gay.”

#56 – Hippies
“Always approach real hippies with caution, especially when seeing them in museums, in head shops, or in your apartment selling you drugs.”

#63 – Jews and Their Idiosyncrasies
“All Jews everywhere are exactly like Woody Allen (pause), famed filmmaker and alleged pedophile.” “Non-Jews will laugh at Jewish characters out of deep-seated jealousy and Jews like to laugh at themselves out of self-hate. That’s 100% of your audience. “

After announcing that Bob Odenkirk was unable to attend the reading, Hoffman and Rudoren introduced “Dick Mathers, Hot College Comic of the Years 2005, 2006, and 2007 as designated by Hot College Magazine, formerly Rolling Stone.” Odenkirk ran through the crowd, his fists pumping, yelling “Master of the Double Fist” and “I’m makin’ money so many different ways!”

On stage, Odenkirk’s arms were in constant motion as he shouted searing one-liners including:

• “Is everyone in this town gay?”
• “How come gay guys are like women?”
• “What’s with women?”
• “Why do they always pay in nickels?”

Through the fist pumping and woman bashing, Odenkirk slowed down and a voiceover track filled the space with Dick Mather’s interior monologue…

• Do chicks really do what I just said they do, or is that just something my girlfriend did once?
• What the hell is wrong with my mind? Is it broken?
• I should just do my impersonation of my dad!

Suddenly, the fists started pumping again and Dick Mathers was back in the zone, impersonating his dad with an undercurrent of barely repressed rage…

• “I’m Dad! I’m bigger than God!”
• “He’s always taking his shoes off and shaking them out!”

Back to the interior monologue….

• They love me! They have no idea that my dad died years ago and that he raped me every year on my birthday!

The audience hyperventilated at the shenanigans, proving the endearing charm of one of Odenkirk’s favorite characters, the clueless college comedian. After the show a few fans gushed compliments to Odenkirk, and we overheard him say, “It’s a blast making fun of Dane Cook.”

#68 – “Making Fun of Some Else’s Flaws.” The book works!

Sarah Coffey has written book, art, and design reviews for Venus, apartmenttherapy.com, The Modernist, and the late, great Punk Planet.

Date: Sunday, June 24th
Time: 1pm
Location: Quimby’s
Participants: BOB ODENKIRK, Gary Rudoren, Eric Hoffman

I tain’t misbehavin’ when I bold the name of… oh god… Bob Odenkirk!!!!!!! This Time Out feature makes the book sound intriguing. Couple that with a guest appearance from one of the founders of Mr. Show and you have a winner. A beyond-winner. A Mr. Show Book Club winner. I will high-five anyone who yells out any song by the Monsters of Megaphone as Odenkirk takes the stage.

Date: June 22nd
Time: 8pm - 12am
Location: The Halfway House (1539 N. Damen)

The flier below is an example of what happens when we do things independently of our designer, the beatific Nicole Balch. Don’t let it dissuade you from coming to our party. We will rock you, Chicago.

Date: June 20, 2007
Time: 8:00 p.m. - 9:30 p.m.
Location: Black Rock (3614 North Damen Avenue)
Cost: FREE, 21 plus
Participants: Curated by Matthias Regan and featuring Rubba Ducky Press, Beard of Bees Press, Transparent Tiger Press, and Answer Press , plus readings by Eric Elshtain, Amy England, Salem Collo-Julin, Joel Felix, and others.

“The Best of the Really Really Small Presses”

At this, one of the the kick-off events for the 2007 Printers Ball, the Reconstruction Room “celebrates the chapbook” by bringing together the work of more than six Chicago poets and publishers who make small, non-commercial artist’s books the primary vehicle for their poetry. I’m particularly interested in this Rubba Ducky Press, but I wish their site let me view the book covers and formats. I guess that’s just one more reason to actually attend the event, eh?